Chapter 40

 I wanted to get back to my room as quickly as possible. I had to be careful to make it look like I was not trying to run away from Tommy. If Tommy was going to think that I was on his side, I was going to have to play the part.

“Julie,” Tommy said as I put my hand on the doorknob in the bedroom.

“Yes?” I asked.

“Jimmy is gone and you are going to waste our time together?”

“I’m sorry. I’m just really tired. I was going to take a nap.”

“I don’t care. Come over here.”

He cocked his head to motion down toward his bedroom. Tommy was disgusting, and I had no idea what he would do to me if we were alone in his room. Nausea hit me when I thought of the possibilities.

“Jules.” He must have seen the hesitation on my face. “Jimmy is never going to know. No one is going to tell him.”

“He wants me to stay in bed though,” I said.

“You will be,” he said. “You’ll just be in mine instead.”

My stomach twisted itself into a tight knot. My throat started to contract and I was afraid that I would not be able to speak without crying.

“What if they come home and we don’t hear them?” I said. “We’d be caught.”

“They won’t be home for hours,” Tommy said.

“What if they come home early?”

“Juliet.” The venom had returned to his voice. I bit down on my bottom lip. “Jimmy has obviously not taught you anything. Stop asking me questions. You’re not allowed to do that.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I just don’t want to be caught by your Dad and get in trouble.”

Tommy laughed. I crossed my arms, and I pulled at the sleeves of the hoodie Jimmy had given me to sleep in.

“You’re such a good girl,” he said. “You’re a lot better than those bitches we drag into this house.”

I let my jaw drop when I heard Tommy say that word. Jimmy had told me many times that swearing was not allowed in the house. It was the last thing I expected to hear Tommy say.

“Calm down,” he said. “It’s just a word.”

“I thought there was no swearing,” I said.

Tommy laughed even harder and ran his fingers through his short hair. He shook his head and ran his hand down to the stubble that has been lining his jaw for the past few weeks.

“No swearing?” he said wryly. He walked toward me at a slow pace. I dropped my gaze so that I was looking down at the floor. “Dad says there’s not swearing in this house, but that rule only seems to apply to this family. Do you know what everyone says when they’re pleading for their life? It’s all the words we aren’t supposed to say.”

Tommy was right in front of me. My gaze was still low, so all I could see was his bare feet sticking out from his faded flannel pajama bottoms. He grabbed the bottom of my chin and forced me to look him in the eyes.

“You would like it,” he said.

I shook my head. He kept a tight hold on my chin.

“Oh, yeah, you would,” he said. “You’ve done it before. Too bad he was unconscious when they had you slit his throat. It’s best when they’re awake and know what is going on. You know why?”

I knew he did not expect me to answer the question, but I still shook my head.

“A person’s true self comes out in the last few moments of their life,” he said. “Especially if someone they love is there with them too. You can see who is a spineless coward, which is most of them, and who has the balls to deal with their fate.

“I mean, becoming that person is awesome. You know, the person that decides their fate. You’re the most important person in their life. They’re relying on you, and you’re crushing their bones or slitting their throat. It’s beautiful.”

I was shaking, and I knew Tommy could see it. I thought back to how Gabe made me cut off that man’s face as his wife screamed. I had no idea how Tommy could find enjoyment in that.

“I can’t wait until someone else comes onto our property,” he said, “and not because I’m hungry. I want to feel that rush again. The feeling when you drag your blade through someone’s skin….there’s no words to describe it. But you know about it already.”

I swallowed hard past the lump growing in my throat. I shifted my weight from foot to foot. Tommy loosened his grip on my chin and slid his hand down to my throat.

“You’ll feel it with me,” Tommy said with a smirk. “When you’re mine we’ll share it. We won’t wait for someone to come onto our property either. I hate waiting, it sucks. It will just be you, me, and the blood. So much blood.”

Tommy chuckled and shook his head. I could no longer stand to look him in the eyes. My gaze dropped to his shoulder.

“There’s so much blood in the human body,” he said.

Tommy brushed a piece of my hair off of my face. He leaned in and crushed his lips against mine. When he pulled away, I faked a smile so that he could not see how disgusted I was.

“Go cook me something,” he said. “Use meat.”

“Charles told me I couldn’t,” I said.

“I don’t care,” he told me. “You are going to do it, and if anyone asks you’re going to take the blame for it.”

“But -“

“Just do it.”

Tommy grabbed my arm and pushed me forward. I kept a tight grip on the banister as I walked down the stairs. I tried my best not to think about my body tumbling down the steps and lying in a puddle of my own blood.

When we safely made it to the kitchen, Tommy pulled out a chair and watched me as I fried up the last piece of meat. I prayed that Jimmy and Charles would be home any moment.

—

Tommy made me sit with him at the table. My stomach was growling, but I did not want to get up to the fridge. I knew that the piece of toast Jimmy left me was still on the nightstand. I had no idea how long Tommy was going to make me sit here.

He was shovelling the food into his mouth. When he was done, he pushed the plate across the table toward me. His chair screeched across the floor as he stood. He didn’t say anything to me, but winked before he went up the stairs.

My knees wobbled as I stood. I scrubbed his plate and the frying pan. I was sick thinking about Charles coming home and discovering all of the meat was gone.

I held onto my stomach as I walked up the stairs. The stairs creaked with each slow and cautious step I took. Once my feet were firmly on the upstairs floor, I ran toward my bedroom. I closed the door behind me and collapsed on the floor. I crawled over to the bathroom. I slammed the door behind me.

I pressed my back up against the door. There was no lock anymore, so this was the best I could do to keep me safe. I was too weak to move any furniture and barricade the door.

I waited until Jimmy came home.

—

I let out a cry as I fell backward. My eyes sprung open and my heart pounded in my chest. Two cold hands came out and grabbed my arms. I looked up to see that I had fallen back into Jimmy’s legs. I must have fallen asleep waiting for him.

“Whoa, Julie,” he said. He sounded just as shocked as I felt. “Why are you on the floor?”

“I must have fallen asleep,” I said.

I rubbed my eyes with the back of my hand. Jimmy leaned down and picked me up off the floor. He lifted me up in his arms and curled me into his body. He still had his jacket on, so he must have come up here as soon as he got home. He was worried about me. He wanted to make sure that I was okay.

“Why were you on the floor?” he asked.

“Maybe I was sleepwalking,” I said.

Jimmy placed me down on the bed, but I clinged to his jacket. He pried my fingers off him.

“You’ve got to be careful, Julie,” he said. “You could have hurt the baby.”

“I was scared,” I said.

“Why? Was Tommy bothering you?”

I nodded, and the tears pricked at the back of my eyes. Jimmy closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. He reached out to grab my hand.

“What did he do?” Jimmy asked. “Did he touch you?”

“He tried to kill our baby,” I said. “He threatened to push me down the stairs.”

Jimmy tightened his grip on my hand.

“Are you serious?” he asked.

“Yes.” A tear escaped my eye and rolled down my cheek.

Jimmy let go of my hand and shook his head. He got up off the bed and stormed out into the hall. I scrambled off of the bed and followed him.

“Tommy, I’m going to kill you!” Jimmy yelled as he hurried down the hall.

I was close behind Jimmy. I looked over my shoulder to see Charles barging up the stairs.

Jimmy opened the door, and Tommy was nowhere in the room. Jimmy pushed me to the side as he went back out into the hallway. The door to the bathroom at the end of the hallway was shut. I could hear the sound of someone gagging. Jimmy pounded on the door with his fist.

“Get out here!” Jimmy shouted.

“What’s going on, James?” Charles asked from behind us.

Jimmy did not pay attention to his father. He banged on the door again before opening it. Tommy was standing up from the toilet, and was wiping the back of his mouth with his hand. Jimmy pushed Tommy and knocked him over into the tub. Charles put his hand on my shoulder and stepped past me as he went into the bathroom. He grabbed Jimmy’s shoulders and pulled him off of Tommy.

“What is going on here?” Charles asked.

“He tried to kill my son,” Jimmy said. “I told you we couldn’t leave him alone with Julie.”

“I’ve been throwing up all day,” Tommy said. “How could I try to kill your baby? Julie is obviously lying again.”

Charles looked over his shoulder at me. He raised an eyebrow.

“He threatened to push me down the stairs,” I said. “He wanted to kill my baby.”

“You’re such a liar!” Tommy yelled. “Look in the toilet. I’ve been sick all day.”

I looked in the toilet to see that it was full of vomit. Jimmy raised his fist, but Charles grabbed his arm and stopped him.

“James, leave your brother alone,” Charles said.

“You can’t possibly believe him,” Jimmy said.

“There’s evidence that Tommy is sick,” he said. “He could not have been bothering Juliet.”

“But he -” I started.

“Juliet!” Charles silenced me. “It’s up to Jimmy whether or not to punish you. Lying is a bad habit.”

“I’m not lying,” I said.

“Disrespect is an even worse habit.”

I bit on my lip. Jimmy took a step back and put his arm around my shoulders. Tommy climbed out of the bathtub. He pulled us out of the bathroom and brought us down to our bedroom. He slammed the door behind us. He got down on his knees and put both of his hands on my belly. I covered his hands with mine.

“I’m not going to punish you,” Jimmy said. “I’m just glad you two are safe.”

“Thank you,” I said.

“I’m never leaving you alone with Tommy again.”

“Thank you.”

There was a knock on the door. Jimmy got up off of his knees. Charles walked in. His brows were furrowed and he was scowling.

“Juliet, I was just in the fridge,” he said. “I have a question: where did the meat go?”