Chapter 53

Tommy gripped my side even harder. I kissed Hunter’s forehead. I was shaking and I did not want him to know anything was wrong.

“What do you say?” Tommy asked.

I squeezed my eyes shut as I tried to think. I didn’t want Carrie to get hurt. I knew if he was nicer to her, she would settle in right away. I was Jimmy’s wife though. If Jimmy found out that I had sex with Tommy he would kill me.

“Before you answer, I want you to know something,” Tommy said. “I’m getting impatient with Carrie. If she continues to scream and fight me, I will make that wound on her stomach look like a scratch.”

I struggled to swallow against the lump in my throat. I was nodding without even noticing.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll do it.”

“Julie,” I could hear Jimmy say from the other side of the hall. “Come to our room.”

“You won’t regret this.” Tommy kissed my cheek and I thought I was going to be sick. “If you tell Jimmy about this I will kill Hunter and Carrie.”

I pulled myself out of his grasp. I stepped out into the hall. Jimmy was leaning against the doorframe of our room. I struggled to stop my feet from running toward him. I did not want Jimmy to know that anything was wrong.

He wrapped his arm around me and kissed me. He picked Hunter up out of my arms and smiled at him.

“I just wanted to get you out of Tommy’s bedroom,” he said. “You can warm up dinner. I’ll take care of Hunter.”

“Okay.” I got up on my toes and gave him another kiss.

I hurried downstairs and pulled the leftovers out of the fridge. I hummed to myself as I tried my best not to think about Tommy’s deal. My hands were shaking, and I could not stop them. Tommy would come inside tomorrow and force me into his bed.

An awkward weight came thudding down the stairs. I looked over my shoulder to see Carrie. She had a tight grip on the railing and Tommy was beside her. His arm was snaked around her waist as he helped her. Carrie’s face winced with every step that she took. I listened as she shuffled over to the table and Tommy pulled the chair out at the dining room table.

I put the food on the table. Charles came down and smiled when he saw Carrie. She stared down at her knees and her hair draped down in front of her face. Jimmy came down with Hunter in his arms. He placed Hunter down in his crib.

We passed around dinner with no one knowing of this deal.

—

I did not want to let go of Jimmy before he left to go outside. I had my arms wrapped tightly around him and had my face buried in his neck. Jimmy chuckled as I nuzzled my face into his neck and he rubbed my back. He pulled himself away from me and pressed his lips against my forehead. Charles and Tommy were already outside.

“Be good,” he said.

“I will,” I said before kissing him again.

I watched as Jimmy left the kitchen. Carrie was sitting at the table and Hunter was in his crib. I did not see any new bruises or cuts on Carrie’s face or arms. I knew that Tommy kept his side of the deal so I was going to have to repay him.

“We need to clean today,” I said.

Carrie nodded and followed me to the closet. I handed her a broom and pulled out the mixture of water and vinegar I use to disinfect everything. Carrie started sweeping the floor while I washed the counter and the sink.

“Is this all you do all day?” Carrie asked.

“Yeah,” I said. “It gets really boring.”

“No doubt. I’d go crazy.”

“I couldn’t wait for there to be another girl in this house.”

“I won’t be here for much longer.” The doubt was obvious in her voice. “Someone must be looking for me.”

I shrugged. “You never know.”

I always gave Carrie the same blatant answer whenever she talked about leaving. I knew that she would not be going anywhere.

Carrie and I talked about pointless things for a few hours. She filled me in on everything that has gone on in the world for the past two years. She told me about celebrity meltdowns, new blockbusters, horrible crimes, and she even hummed me a few new songs.

The kitchen door opened and my heart dropped in my stomach. Tommy walked in and had his usual smirk. Carrie’s eyes grew wide. She knew it was odd for him to come inside so early.

“Jules, get upstairs,” he said.

I nodded and looked over at Carrie.

“Can you watch Hunter for a bit?” I asked her.

“Of course,” she said. Her brows were furrowed together.

Tommy walked up the stairs and I followed behind him. My head was spinning as we got closer to Tommy’s room. I thought that I was going to pass out at any moment. He reached out behind himself and grabbed my wrist before slamming the door shut.

His fingers curled tighter into my wrist as he pulled me closer to him. He crashed his lips against mine and the bile was rising in the back of my throat. His free hand ran down my back.

“Oh, God,” he mumbled under his breath. “You don’t know how long I have wanted to do this.”

I chewed on my bottom lip as I kept my gaze down to the floor. I had to keep reminding myself that I am doing this to keep Carrie safe and my family together.

“Get on the bed,” he said.

I turned around and crawled onto the bed. The sheets were still in a tangled mess.

Tommy pulled his shirt up over his head. The key dangled around his neck. I brought my knees up to my chest and wrapped my arms around myself.

“Come on, Jules,” he said. “Take off your clothes.”

I let out a shaky breath and untangled myself. My fingers fumbled with the buttons on my shirt. Tommy’s eyes were locked on my chest. He pushed me back on the bed and climbed on top of me. He pressed his lips against my neck and trailed down to my collarbone.

Tommy leaned back and unbuttoned my jeans. He ripped them off and I squeezed my eyes shut to stop myself from crying. Tommy had harassed me when I first came to the house, but I have never been this exposed to him before.

I listened as he undid his belt.

I had to keep reminding myself that I was doing this to keep Carrie safe and keep my family together.

—

Tommy was panting when he rolled off me. My eyes and nose burned with tears that I was holding back. I laid there and I let him assault me. The worst part was when he made me talk.

“I want you to make those noises,” he said as he was thrusting inside me. “The ones I can hear you making with Jimmy.”

I chewed on my lip before I forced myself to moan.

Tommy snaked his arm around my shoulders and I clutched the blankets to my chest. He let out a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair.

“That was better than with Carrie,” he said. “I am going to like this deal.”

I squeezed my eyes shut.

“I better get going,” I said. “Carrie is probably suspicious and may tell Jimmy or Charles.”

“She won’t,” he said. “She’s too scared to.”

I curled my fingers tighter into the blanket. I couldn’t bear lying in this bed. I wanted to grab Hunter, cry, and run outside to Jimmy. He could never know about this though.

“Dad and Jim are going into town Sunday,” he said. “We’re going to leave while they are gone.”

“What day is today?” I asked.

“Thursday.”

Three days.

I only had three days to figure something out. It was seeming less likely that Tommy was going to fall in love with Carrie.

“I better get going,” Tommy said. “I don’t want Dad noticing that I am gone.”

I sat on the bed. The blankets were still in my grasp and hiding my body. Tommy propped himself up on his elbow. I grabbed my clothes off of the ground with my free hand. Tommy watched me as I put my clothes back on. I hurried out of Tommy’s room without looking back.

I ran down the stairs to see Carrie was holding Hunter. She had Hunter in one arm and was dusting the shelves in the living room with her other hand. Carrie’s face went pale when she saw me. I ran my fingers through my disheveled hair. I took Hunter out of her arms.

“Julie, what happened?” she asked.

Tommy came down the stairs and we turned to look at him. He walked over to the door. He stopped and looked over his shoulder.

“Keeping our deal for tomorrow too?” he asked.

I nodded before looking down at Hunter. The door slammed shut. Carrie reached out and rubbed my back.

“Julie, what is going on?” she asked.

“It doesn’t matter,” I said.

A tear rolled down my cheek and I wiped it away with the back of my hand. Carrie’s eyes widened and she shook her head.

“What is this deal?” she asked. “Is Tommy hurting you?”

“I told you that it doesn’t matter,” I said. I did not want to tell Carrie. She would probably tell Charles trying to protect me. “Don’t ask Tommy either. It will upset him.”

“Julie-“

“Keep cleaning. I’m going to start dinner.”

I turned around before she could say anything. I placed Hunter down in his crib. I pulled some meat out of the fridge. I diced up some carrots as I let the meat fry.

I was thankful that Carrie did not say anything else to me.