Chapter 36

 Evey could not sleep. Her chest ached as she could not get her mind off of Josie. She insisted that Fiona go back to Johnson’s house and sleep. Fiona reluctantly agreed.

Evey thought about going back up to the bedroom. Ford was on watch, and he would soon be coming back inside. She was sure that he would get into the bed next to her. Tears pricked at the back of Evey’s eyes when she thought about having sex with Ford. If they had stayed in the living room, or if one of them was sleeping on the couch, they would have seen Josie leave the house. They were being selfish and irresponsible.

Evey grabbed the blanket off the back of the couch and wrapped it around her shoulders. She laid on the couch. The single flame was flickering in the candle. She stared at the stairs, which she could barely see in the dark, and was too afraid to blink.

Would Joey try to leave the house? Would he try to go and look for his sister? She could not let him die either.

The front door creaked as it opened. Evey forced herself to close her eyes as Ford walked inside. She did not want to talk to him about what had happened. She did not want him to try and convince her to go upstairs to the bedroom. Would she have the restraint to not cry into Ford’s chest all night? She rarely cried before the world ended. She hated it.

She listened as Ford’s boots walked across the floor. He stopped walking for a moment, and Evey held her breath.

Just go upstairs, Evey thought. Please, don’t talk to me.

Ford sighed before he walked away and up the stairs. Evey opened her eyes when she heard the bedroom door click shut.

A knot was in her stomach as she watched the stairs for Joey.

—

When Ford came down the stairs, Evey was emptying peaches into a bowl in the kitchen. She stared at the canned fruit, not wanting to look at him. He touched her waist. His hand slid around her stomach and pulled her close. She jumped, and her heart pounded. She spun around and pushed him away. He stepped forward, but Evey stopped him. She kept her hand on his chest to force distance between them. He furrowed his brows as he looked down at her hand.

“What?” he asked.

“We fucked up last night,” she said.

“No.” Ford shook his head. “We fucked last night.”

“We shouldn’t have.”

Ford grabbed her hand. He stepped forward, and Evey backed until she hit the counter. She moved to push Ford away, but he snatched her other wrist. He trapped her against the kitchen counter with their hands between them. Evey held her breath as she looked into Ford’s eyes. His face, as always, was stuck in a stern expression.

“You’re only saying that because of Josie,” he said.

“A little girl died because we weren’t paying attention,” she said. “If we stopped for that stupid bear, none of this would happen.”

“We couldn’t stop for that toy.”

Evey lowered her head as she stared down at the floor. Ford squeezed her wrists.

“Look at me,” he said.

She let out a deep breath and returned to making eye contact.

“We’ll keep Joey safe,” he said. “That’s all we can do.”

“I was supposed to keep Josie alive, too,” she said.

“Don’t. You can’t do that to yourself.”

Evey bit down on her lip and nodded. Ford let go of Evey’s wrists. He leaned forward, putting his hands on the counter. His forehead was pressed against Evey’s. His warm breath fanned her face. She closed her eyes and placed her hands against his chest. She curled her fingers into his shirt and pulled him close instead of pushing him away. His fingers grazed her chin and tilted her head. His lips brushed against hers, and she tightened her grip on his shirt. She pulled him closer to deepen the kiss.

When their lips broke, Ford was smiling. Evey wrapped her arms around Ford and laid her head against his chest. She listened to his steady heartbeat and closed her eyes. Ford rubbed her back. The thoughts of Josie and her family lingered in the back of her mind. Would these thoughts ever go away?

“We have to tell Joey,” Evey said.

“I can,” Ford said.

She shook her head. Ford dragged his fingers up her spine until they were in her hair. He twirled one of her curls around his finger.

“No, I should,” she said.

“You sure?” he asked.

“Yes.”

Ford kissed the top of Evey’s head.

“I’ll tell the others,” he said. “They’re outside.”

Evey sighed before letting go of Ford. She was tempted to reach for his hand but knew they could not walk outside like that. She did not want any of the others, especially Gomez, to know about the relationship forming between them.

Johnson was standing in the middle of the road. Connar, Anjo, Roger, and Fiona formed a circle beside Johnson. Gomez was sitting on the steps of one of the houses. He smirked when he saw Ford and Evey leaving the house. He joined the other civilians as Ford and Evey approached.

Evey could not look at any of them. She had failed at keeping one of the twins safe. That was her job, and she could not do it.

“What’s wrong?” Connar asked.

Evey let out a deep breath before looking up. The group was silent, and they were all staring at Evey. Her eyes glistened with tears, and Connar furrowed his brows. She was thankful Ford was going to tell the others about Josie. If she spoke, she would be sobbing once again. She had never cried this much before.

“Josie is gone,” Ford said.

“What do you mean?” Anjo asked. “How can she be gone?”

“She snuck out last night,” Ford said. “She went after that bear.”

“How did she sneak out?” Gomez asked. The smirk remained on his lips. Evey balled up her fists, wanting to punch him in the face again. “Wasn’t Evey supposed to be taking care of her?”

Gomez’s words were like a punch in the gut. She let out a shaky breath.

Do not cry, Evey said to herself. Don’t let Gomez make you cry.

“Evey can’t keep an eye on her every second of the day,” Ford said. “She has to sleep too.”

“What about you?” Gomez asked. “You didn’t see her leave?”

“I was asleep too.”

Gomez clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth as he shook his head.

“So the twins have one room, and Evey has the other,” he said. “Where were you sleeping? How come you didn’t hear her?”

“There’s a third bedroom,” Ford lied.

Gomez raised a brow.

“Really?” he asked. “Why don’t we go have a look?”

“Ford’s sleeping arrangements are not our concern,” Johnson said. “We lost another member of our team.”

“We are not going to look for her?” Roger asked. “She could not have gotten far.”

“She’s gone,” Johnson said. “Every day we are out here, we are at risk. I am not losing another member.”

Gomez crossed his arms over his chest. Evey’s knuckles ached as she could not uncurl her fists. She was comforted knowing she was armed with a gun and that Gomez had nothing on him.

“Have we decided how to get into the city without dying?” Gomez asked. “The Infected are going to eat us in minutes. We do not have enough bullets to kill everyone there. Especially now that you all disarmed me.”

“We have not figured that out yet,” Johnson said. “We will reach the city tomorrow. We have twenty-four hours to come up with a plan.”

“Twenty-four hours?” Gomez said sarcastically. “Great.”

Evey thought back to the flashlight when she was looking for Josie. She was almost killed, but the batteries died. The Infected did not see her, so they did not attack. She was able to weave her way through the hoard without dying.

“The light,” Evey said quietly.

“What?” Johnson asked.

She cleared her throat to push away the tears. She spoke louder.

“The light,” she repeated. “The Infected can’t see in the dark.”

“Why do you think that?” Johnson asked.

“We looked for Josie last night,” she said. “They were going to attack us, but our flashlight died. They stopped. It was as if they could not see.”

“It’s true,” Ford said.

Gomez scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“So that is what we are going to do?” he asked. “We’re going to go into Toronto in the middle of the night? Creep around in the dark and hope not to be eaten?”

“That’s exactly what we are going to do,” Johnson said.