I patrol the Australian Outback as a country soldier. I have just met my final match.

The Australian Outback was a wonderful playground of nightmares for foreigners – such as the two American officers who visited as part of an exchange program a few years ago. Whilst I was repulsive to extremely hot conditions, I enjoyed the career, working my way from the sand dunes of the Middle East, hopping from metropolitan postings, conducting useless recruitment operations in airshows, and even going for a stint in the special forces, spending about 3 years conducting survelliance operations worldwide. Finally, I was sent from Swanbourne to Alice Springs to advise my new posting…