Chapter 1

I was sitting on the couch when my dad called me. I stared at my phone, perplexed, until the buzzing stopped. A butt dial, I figured. My dad was known for those. But then a text came through.

"Call me when you get a chance."

That confirmed that it was not, in fact, a butt dial. Further perplexed, I called my dad.

"Hey, you called?" I asked.

"Yeah. Um. So. Uh… my dad is dead. Katie hadn't heard from him for a couple days, and she went over.. and she found him…" he stammered.

Katie was his one surviving sister. Karol had died when I was in middle school. Car accident. She had gotten drunk and ended up driving her car straight through the trailer of a semi truck, if I recall correctly. There's a history of substance abuse on my dad's side of the family.

"Oh… I'm so sorry…" I said to break the thick silence that followed my dad's news. I didn't know what else to say. My dad and I had been estranged for years, maintaining only a polite, arms-length relationship. I hadn't seen my paternal grandfather in at least two years.

My dad continued, "Yeah, so… um… I've got a lot to deal with here, but I'll keep you and your sister updated on the funeral and all that…" he trailed off.

"Ok. Yeah, let me know. I'm sorry," I responded.

"Ok. I will. Alright. I'll… talk to you soon. I love you."

"Ok, love you… bye"

"Bye."

My dad sounded like he was on the verge of tears for the entire duration of the call. Again, I didn't really know what to say due to the tense family dynamic. I mean, I did feel bad for him. His mom, my grandmother, had passed away suddenly due to a heart attack when I was in college. Katie was the first one to contact me when that happened.

I sat in disbelief for a while until my own tears came. Admittedly, my tears came from a place of guilt as I hadn't done much to reach out to my grandfather after my grandmother passed.

Eventually, funeral arrangements were made. My dad told my sister and me where to be and when. My sister drove us the two hours down South for the wake. I guess it was a wake? They were putting my grandfather's urn of ashes next to that of my grandmother. So whatever that's technically called.

When we arrived, we were greeted by a few familiar faces. Our dad, our step mom, our aunt Katie and her youngest daughter Elise, and a few other family members my sister and I hadn't seen much of since our parents' divorce. Our dad's cousin, Kevin, was there with his three children. Teenagers now, but the last time I'd seen them they were young children.

We stood in the cramped room, surrounded by a glass-encased perimeter of urns, photos, and trinkets that stood to honor the lives of those who had since passed. It was quiet, and we were waiting, but I wasn't sure what for.

"Is Amy coming?" my dad asked Katie. Amy was Katie's eldest daughter.

"Yeah, she said she's on her way with Aaron," Katie said.

Aaron was Katie's only son. I had copious memories of Christmases and sleepovers with my older sister and our cousin Amy, who was her age, Elise, who was a baby at the time, and Aaron, who was older than Amy. Aaron always kept to himself during the sleepovers, and I only really ever remember him seeming a little creepy at holiday gatherings. Taunting the younger kids in the family, staring a little too long, insisting on hugs that lasted a little too long, things like that. My dad used to joke once my mom, my sister, and I were in the car with him and on the way home that he gave off "serial killer" vibes. I would always just giggle. Sure, he was tall, awkward, wore glasses, had dark, greasy hair and always seemed to smile a little too much, but I never really thought anything of it.

My sister and I hadn't seen him in several years, but we still knew who our cousins were. Even Elise, who was 18 now but whom we hadn't seen in maybe four or five years.

Eventually, Amy showed up. She had a very small child in tow. She hugged my sister and practically ignored me. Ok, I thought, she and my sister had always been closer and maybe I wasn't as recognizable at that point.

Amy toted her small child over to the other side of the cramped room. I knew she had gotten married a while back and had a kid, and I didn't question her husband (now ex) not being there as the family rumor mill had pushed out the story that he had been arrested for contacting minors for sexual meet-ups. She planted herself against a wall and remained there, eyes half-open and glazed for the entirety of the wake. My sister and I assumed she had succumbed to the family curse of addiction, and we solemnly avoided eye contact.

Arriving simultaneously with Amy and her child was a guy. He was shorter than me with a slight frame and dirty blonde hair. Like Amy, he practically ignored me, but he hugged my sister. During the greeting, my sister looked at me with a confused expression as if to say "who the hell is this guy?" I shrugged, and the guy continued to greet others in the room until he eventually took a spot near Amy.

The wake got started. Several people spoke about my grandfather. He was a hard man who rarely displayed emotions other than anger, but he was loving in his own way. He'd joke often, and if you ever needed him, he'd be there. I teared up multiple times.

At the end, my grandfather's ashes were reunited with those of my grandmother as his urn was placed next to hers. We slowly filed out of the room and out in to the open-air walkways of the cemetery. My sister and I hung back to talk to our dad and stepmom as everyone else got into their vehicles and left.

"We're all meeting up at Sizzler, if you want to come have dinner?" my dad offered.

I was ready to go home as it had been an emotional afternoon, and I was ready to go home. "Uh.. I don't know," I said.

"That's fine, just wanted to put the offer out there. But I understand," my dad responded.

Our conversation devolved into a bit of family gossip from there.

"Who was that guy with Amy?" my sister asked the question that had been burning in both of our heads.

"With Amy? That was Aaron," our dad responded with a straight face.

"Woah. Really? That was Aaron?? The short, thin guy who came in with Amy?" I clarified.

"Yeah, guess it's been a while since you've seen him," my dad said.

My sister and I shared a doubtful look. We ended up saying our goodbyes and got in the car and started heading home.

"That was *Aaron*?" my sister voiced the same disbelief that had been swimming through my head.

"There's no way, right? Like, wasn't he way taller? And he had dark hair right?" I recalled.

"Yeah… there's no way that was Aaron."

"Haha, yeah, dad's just gaslighting us. I got the vibe that that guy was like, Amy's boyfriend or something. It was weird."

"Yes! It was weird…" my sister trailed off.

My dad's side of the family has since gathered for Thanksgiving and Christmas, and my sister and I weren't invited. That's just fine with me.

I'm not sure who it was at my grandfather's funeral, but it wasn't my cousin, Aaron