Chapter 5 – August, 1632

Journal entry by Jaralath Caulfield: August 12th, 1632

I went hunting for the first time in quite a while. It felt good to work without someone I could talk too, and the past two years, making conversation with your peers isn’t any more easy now that I got a pretty mark on my face.

I still never joined the faith. Many use the unfortunate expedition as validation for joining Greeshawn Chase and listening to his sermons. I may not have the best respect for the good minister, but the young man could at least try to show sympathy for his father. Day in, day out, I see Angelica Chase, day in day out, leaving her home and to the Muller’s house. She’s taking responsibility in being a nanny of sorts towards Edith, while the little darlings parents are busy farming.

When we cross paths, I take the opportunity to ask how the good minister is doing. It could not be doing him any good seeing the monsters in action. I have seen them for years, but never up close and on the hunt, but he got the whole display in one night and saw several of his own eaten alive. Angelica tells me he rarely speaks, never sleeps, has rarely left his room.

She’d tell me how Minister Chase used to read that book of his with joy and enthusiasm, but now reads it only to search for answers he still never found. Recently, the Minister just sits and stares at the book with hours of silence.

I asked her how their son has been helping out, and she gave no answer. I believe it is because she has none. In the past couple of years, I never see Greeshawn visiting their house, nor has Angelica mentioned him paying any visit. Instead he set up is new home in the mining camps. Angelica at least made the effort of paying him a visit, but I don’t trust her going alone to a camp designed to be a “jail” to the more reprehensible sinners, but I don’t think it should my concern.

I have been walking with her back and forth towards the Muller house for every few days, talking about anything from her husbands well being, stories about her sister, to the weather and chores. And day by day, we never see Greeshawn so much as give her a “Hello ” And as the weeks pass, the more time I spend in the Mueller home.

Things between me and Erik Mueller haven’t been the worse. We were hardly brotherly in the time I spent in his home, but following the unfortunate expedition, I can’t say we have had a soldiers bond. I can’t blame him, watching his father die at the giants spear. I had not love for the man, especially with how he shown hate for those who didn’t join his faith, but he was still Erik’s father, so Erik at least has my sympathies.

So I made time to speak with Erik, and asked how long since it’s been since he went hunting. It probably shouldn’t have been the first thing I asked considering what happened in the woods but after a minute of awkward silence he says to me.

“The beast in the woods are an example of our god’s judgment. So log as I put my faith in Greeshawn Chase, we will be protected.”

As it turns out, Greeshawn has taken dozens of hunting trips but as far as anyone could tell never brought any of the game to the butchers. Then again, I have been out of the job for some time on account of Greeshawn setting up a new butchers shop at the mines.

So without my butchers work, I had nothing to do besides try to mingle, walk and talk with Mahalia, and fish and hunt occasionally. Never really had a companion, save for Arf, loyal mutt that he is. On the rare occasion I had a human companion, they didn’t make the best conversations. Also Greeshawn hasn’t taken Erik on his hunting trips as much as he used to, so we arranged a hunting trip of our own over the past few days.

During the trip, we haven’t found that much in the name of game, despite Arf following us close behind.

“Is he gonna be any trouble ?” Erik points at Arf.

“No sir, he was the one who taught me how to be stealthy and to pick up trails.”

Erik chuckles “How much did that little wolf teach you out here ?”

“Well, he’s yet to tell me how to tie my boots, but I think I’m getting the hang of it.” I joke. “So you sure you’re not afraid ?” I ask him.

“I can’t have room for both fear and faith in my heart.” He tries to affirm.

“No fear ? You saw what I saw for years, and seeing them this close still gives me the willies.” I explain “Need I remind you the wolf creatures are the reasons I am an orphan ? And the stories about where the creatures come from told by Mahalia, don’t strike you as something you should dread and avoid ?”

“We are to fear the wrath and judgment of our god. He is their creator, and true master of the land. He blessed us with food and gold, and it is our colony that is to spread his-” he starts the same speech I heard so many times since I joined the colony.

“Yes, yes. I heard it from the Minister, I heard it from his son and I haven’t been convinced of it being the work of god, any more than I am convinced the wolf people are the work of Zeus.” I interrupt him.

“But surely you must understand why I have to have faith in the Chase’s ?”

I shake my head “For the life of me, I do not. I have read that book of the Minister’s and I find a notable difference between the lord the Minister preached about and the one his son preached about.”

Erik shrugs “Perhaps we are getting a new message.”

“Do you ever think about him ? Your father ?” I ask, immediately regretting it, but continued with what was on my mind “You mean to tell me you are putting your faith in the monsters who killed him ?”

Erik was silent for a moment before he answers “I am not to question. According to Greeshawn, my father was a subject to judgment. Mahalia was trying to lead us to the forest people, and in his hate, my father lead us off the path.”

He didn’t sound so convinced as he said this.

“So you put your faith in a man because he tells you too ?”

“I put my faith in a man because of what he has shown me, and because my entire life, he was like brother to me. And for my whole life, all he did was teach me.”

We must have traveled thirteen miles from the colony when we set camp.

“So what game do you usually catch out here ?” I ask as we try to set a bonfire.

“When Greeshawn and I were boys, we’d bring in a couple of large animals at a time. Moose, elk. With the smaller game, we’d catch an abundance of, we wouldn’t settle for one rabbit or turkey, we’d take a dozen at a time. There was one incident when we got a bear cub in a trap, and when the mother came-” He starts before he stops. I don’t think he wanted to talk about that particular incident.

“There’s little honor in using a trap to catch your kills. Sometimes subduing something is necessary, but if you hunt for food and sport, there’s little point in catching a fox or coon in a trap, having it wait for death like a prisoner. Call me sentimental, but Arf and I always preferred giving our prey a fighting chance.”

“Care to explain ?” Erik asks.

“You probably wouldn’t understand. You haven’t been living in cave or among the animals, but not even a wolf or bear toys with their kills. It’s hardly a gentlemen game. With me an Arf, we’d give our prey some kind of fighting chance, made it feel like we earned our meal.”

We must have been in those woods for two days before we got the best game we could; three rabbits, and a turkey. Just enough to feed a small family such as his. Apparently that’s not enough considering the game Erik usually catches, so he insisted we spend a third day. And while normally there was big game to be found throughout these woods, they must have gotten better at hiding seeing as we haven’t seen the signs of them.

What we did find as we went a few more miles into the woods, we saw familiar foot prints, that looked human but were a little much on the larger side. We’d see tipped over trees, some looking like something snapped them, and some of them too large to be the mere work of a bear. And the few claw marks we did see in their bark, were too deep to be made by a bear either.

Arf had the right idea and darted into another direction. I have previously told Erik that Arf has let to lead me wrong in these woods, so the wise thing to do was to follow him where he runs. But what was peculiar was where he was leading us.

It took me some time to realize he wasn’t leading us to our camp, but to a lodge. I didn’t understand why he led us here, but we settled there for the third night. Still a familiar feeling washed over me. The lodge must have been abandoned for some time, but it still had a stove and chimney, so we had some way of keeping warm. Despite it being passible, the place has been affected by the elements, and by the looks of the place, it was ransacked.

We spent the night surrounding a fire we made, cooking a rabbit, and while we were waiting for sleep, we just continued talking.

“So I haven’t really gotten around to asking, but being a father; what’s it like for you ?” I ask him.

He takes a minute before he answers “It had to be the third scariest experience in my life.”

“You’re afraid of a baby ?”

“No,” Erik shakes his head “I am scared for her. This world is new to her; this experience is new to me, and it hasn’t even been a year and I keep thinking of the worse possible thing happening to her, and how I could be powerless to stop it. I keep having nightmares, be it about the expedition and what could happen to my daughter.”

“And you trust Greeshawn ? With your daughters life I mean. He may have helped you your whole life, but I don’t see how your little girl could benefit from him.” I try to explain to him.

He in turn tries to explain to me “I have to. He tended to Anya when I couldn’t, and it is because of him Anya was able to stay strong and survive any complication that could have happened. I owe too much to Greeshawn to question him, my daughters life especially.”

“It may not be my place,” I start “But if I had a child of my own, I wouldn’t want him or her to live under the influence of a man who beat me, talks about monsters like they were angels and used someone who saw him as a brother as a piece of bear bait.” I then shrug “Then again, I have no son or daughter of my own, so I probably don’t know what I am talking about.”

“Probably.” Erik nods.

As we have been talking, Arf has been moving about in the other rooms in the lodge, and we paid him no heed before he walked up to us and dropped from his mouth a pair of fishing rods.

We stare at them for a moment before Erik asks “I take it your dog is planning a fishing trip ?”

I barely paid him any heed as I took a look at the two fishing rods. One was significantly smaller than the other, clearly made for a child. What was strange was the elements haven’t done much to damage them. I notice Arf standing in a hallway, as if he were waiting for us to follow him. I get up and do so, Erik follows my lead, and Arf leads us to a bedroom.

It was the room of a married couple, abandoned for years and Arf was looking expectantly at a chest at the foot of the bed. After I got it open I found several books and journals, and curiosity quickly got to us. They were a series of fairy tales and myths, most of them written in my mother tongue, but a few letters were written French, Swedish, German, and Greek. I recognized the languages by the letters written by some of the colonies people, although I never actually learned to read those languages.

Erik recognized some of his mother tongue, and explained to me the German letters told the story of a knight appointed by a church to slay a great evil “The Unspeakable One” that’s been stealing children in the Black Forests of Germany, and was granted a weapon from Heaven to do so. He recognized it as a story his father told him, saying it was an obscure fairy tale. He told me how the knight managed to wound the beast, but not slay it.

We continued looking through the journals, and I recognized some of the Gaelic stories as tales told by my own parents, but some of them dated back centuries before either could be alive. But the peak of my curiosity was how my family name kept coming up.

And at the bottom of the chest was numerous drawings. Many in different styles of art from different lands. They depicted numerous creatures, many of them resembling the monsters I’ve been seeing for years. One drawing stood out to me.

It was drawn in the style that I have seen art done by the tribes people, and it was what I first thought was the scariest looking tree I ever laid my eyes on. It was a black trees, two of them arm like and hung low. At second glance almost looked like a crudely drawn person, with something resembling a white human skull where it’s head should be, but it had more dark branches on it’s head looking like a crown or a set of antlers.

It was certainly uncanny how much it reminded me of the shape I’d see out the corner of my eye, or just at the colonies borders, always disappearing before I could actually get a good look at it.

Our thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Arf barking, and we followed him to the back of the hut, and he led us to the side of a nearby lake. There appeared to be two graves just off the edge of the lake, with stones placed over them. There was no dates set on the stones but I recognized my family name, and that of my father, and that of my mother.

I didn’t know or wonder who knew them and buried them, and I didn’t care how. But the emotions I felt in that moment could not be put into words. I guess “heavy” comes the close, because it was like a weight in my chest dropped to my stomach with such force I dropped to my knees. Contrary to what Erik might tell you, I was not crying, is only had dust in my eyes, but I found my voice after a moment and I realized his hand was on my shoulder.

“I don’t need to coddling! Do I look like a baby ?”

“You certainly sound like one.” Erik said, not hiding the bemused tone in his voice, or smirk on his face. To be fair, we both laughed at this point.

“So,” I start “I don’t know how else to put this into words, but this land used to be my families, and it doesn’t appear no one else has claimed ownership, so I guess what’s here is mine.” I continue as I have an epiphany.

I lead Erik back to my parents bedroom, and collect the letters and books in the chest. And I shared with him what I am about to share to you.

“I may not have that much in the form of wealth, and I know we haven’t exactly gone out to hunt for treasure. But these stories, the stories my parents shared with me,” I start handing him the German letters first “And while we may not have the biggest brotherly bond in recorded history, but I feel I at least owe your little girl a gift. And some of these stories, they haven’t even shared with me, but with the languages written in these letters we can find a translator. I want to give the same kind of gift my family gave me.”

“You want to share these tales with the colony.” Erik asks me, as if I haven’t just explained myself.

“Aye, I do. Think of it like this,” I continue “You people keep your holy books and tales within them, and while I may not share your faith, I see how real it is for you and your people. You speak of this god, this lord and his people, as if they were still here among you. If they had existed, they’d have to be long dead, and by telling their stories you are keeping them alive in some form or another. Well, for the longest time, I kept telling the stories my family told me as a lad, and to me that was my faith. My mother told me with her last breath, that when I look to the stars, she will be looking back; that when I feel the wind, she will be standing beside me. But to me, these stories kept them alive. That is why these have been my parents greatest gifts, and that’s why I want to share my gifts.”

“We were never that close Caulfield, why are you trusting me with this ?”

“Because I want you to give your daughter the best and happiest memories a human can muster, and I want to make sure when she’s grown and old, she looks back to you the same way I always looked back at my mother and father.” I finish placing the chest in his hands.

We were both silent for a moment before we heard Arf barking again. We turn our attention what he’s been hearing, and the sight of tree tops moving in the distance was our cue to leave this place. I wasn’t eager to leave my childhood home, walking down memory lane, but survival took priority, and it’s not like we had the ammunition for a fight, so we followed Arf the way he was running yet again.

As usual, and for the first time for Erik, I followed Arf in the ways we can avoid unwanted attention. Gugwe, Genoskwa, Dogmen and Mountain Giants; I knew the signs when I saw and heard them, and knew how to avoid them. What was unusual for me was how close they sounded as we neared the colony, as they normally don’t venture that far, but the sounds they’ve been making.

In all my years, I rarely heard fear or mourning in their howls and whoops, and yet that’s what Arf, Erik and I heard all the way to the colony. These creatures don’t normally get this close to the Colony, not even to hunt, so something must have spooked them, or whatever was already wrong with them became worse.

When we reached the colony, Erik and I parted ways, Arf took his place back in the forest. When I went home, I had nothing to butcher from our hunt, but Erik went home with the gifts I gave him. I sure hope Little Edith appreciates them.

Gospel According to Greeshawn Chase: August 18th 1632

Let this be the first message of the new Gospel. Let it be known the spreading of the truth begins here.

As the people of Awesiaki have witnessed from by birth, that my life is by the grace of the great spirit, and thus it is he who guides me, he who gives me strength, and he that speaks to me, teaches me and made me who I am today.

It is that very spirit that blessed our land with an abundance of food and gold, that through me pulls sinners to salvation. My colonists called it “God”, the heathen girl Mahalia calls it “Devourer”. I call it the truth, for he has served me far more than my father’s god.

Over the year, I have run my fathers church, while his faith was shaken by the beasts of the land. He calls himself a holy man, and yet he denies the very god who promised us that we would never go hungry. It is I who baptize our children in his name, it is I who knows it’s voice, and I who gives it communion with our people.

And the faith of our people is strong, unchallenged. No one doubts or fears, for they know what the price of weakness is. I am a forgiving man, a man of mercy, and mercy requires strength. Those who have the strongest wills are the richest in our spirit, and as I am the strongest, I am therefore the richest.

The sinners I bring to salvation, served us well in the mines. I brought hundreds of the worse sinners to our kingdom, and offered redemption; thieves, cutthroats, murderers, rapists, pirates who settle on this land to hide from what ever empire pursues them. I know them by the sin they reek of, and they most of all knew the truth of my gospel. They knew my father was too copious when it comes to distributing our gold to others. They knew he was too lenient when it comes to judgement, and they know what it is to truly fear the lord. And they know who the true saviour of this colony is.

And now they serve me not just as miners, but as my hunting parties, and they capture the greatest game, and in our mines we hide the greatest treasures. But over the years, I know the greatest treasure to be the heathen who walks among us; truly a miracle from above, a savage woman raised among savage beasts. With her knowledge of them, she had a following of her own. Since she integrated with us, she has yet to follow our faith, but has become our colony’s greatest teacher. Perhaps with me, she could be more.

Those who seek a better understanding of the beasts, especially the children, flock to her each and everyday so that she can share the knowledge and tales. I only find it concerning that she teaches that some of these beasts are to be avoided, approached with caution at best. She has also yet to appreciate our lord’s design. I also find it concerning that she spends so much time with that Jaralath boy; he’s not even a butcher anymore, we made him obsolete by setting up a new butchers operation along with our mines. To his credit, Jaralath still has his skills when he hunts independently, and while he’s still as weak as he was as the child I found in that cave, I must say I’ve come to appreciate some of the stories he tells recently. My personal favourite was the tale of a king who turned into a wolf for angering a false god. Perhaps Jaralath can find a way to work in our new world, regardless he wishes to or not.

Some will call this a confession letter. Confessions are what people use to gain forgiveness for ones sins, but I don’t sin for I serve the will of the true god of this world. It matters not as people will come to know the real truth anyways.

For sometime my father has secluded himself into our home, leaving his preaching responsibilities to me. He would rarely walk to my mother, giving the woman too much freedom to mingle and step out of line. It would seem that seeing the truth has shaken his faith it. Only a blind man cannot see the very grace that blessed his son and land; he sang nothing but praise to it for his son’s whole life, and now that he’s seen it’s judgment, he now doubts it.

Last night, I was yet again overseeing the mining operations and preparations, and as I made my way to the mines, and after nearly a year of silence and isolation, my father found the courage to approach me, and I led him forward. He wanted to talk to me about the spirit, and I wanted to tell to him the same.

“All I wish to do is spread his will and word. I would think a holy man would understand, if not support my cause. What mistake have I made father ?” I ask.

He tells me “I have seen these beasts, and what they can do. I have seen them reduced some of our best hunters to scrapes of meat. Men who have trusted and followed me, slaughtered by these forest people. I fail to see how they could be anything else than demons!”

“What you saw was the wrath and judgement of your Holy Spirit, no different then the very Hell your church preaches about. Do you not all things, in all creation, serve the creator in one way or another ?”

“The word of God taught about giants. Never said anything good of them.” My father tries to warn.

“What you have read is the old message. Now it is a new world, and when the god of this world granted you this land and prosperity, granted you my life, you question your sons purpose ? If judgment must be poured onto this new world, who are we to question ?” I try to explain to him as we enter the mining camps.

Surrounded by my followers, I take comfort in knowing I was in the company of those who understood me. And they do as our followers are to and follow us both towards the caverns.

“I want you too look at what we are preparing for.” I gesture to him towards an especially deep carven my followers have been preparing for some time. “As you would have known, had you left your house more often, we have been storing our hunting catches here . If there’s one thing my followers have experience with, it’s the right way to use a blade.”

“Why would you set up shop here ? This is a mining camp, are our farmers not enough ?” My father continues to question.

“A necessary evil I’m afraid. I must find some way to provide the flesh and blood of communion.” Before my father could further object I state “And merely digging for gold is not enough of for these poor souls. They need honest work to better serve the spirit.”

“Better serve ? Have I not told you we are to redistribute our wealth to the tribes and colonies less fortunate than us ?”

“And have I not told you that the more we give, the more we lose ? The gold and this land is a gift, one that you squander.” I try to lecture, hoping in vain that it would finally dawn on him, but alas, he had his nose in his book for too long.

“Our lord teaches that the greatest virtue, the best way to serve him, is to see what we have, and give it to those who have nothing.!”

“Your lord maybe, but the god of this world tells me that in order to establish his kingdom, we are to take! What is a king without his wealth ? What is a king without his power ? You squander your wealth, and what do you do ? You create scavengers, beggars, who do nothing but take and take, until there is nothing left! And what does that leave us ? We become scavengers ourselves! You create a kingdom of the poor and weak! Why would you serve a god who asks these of you ? Why can you not see the truth of the one who gives us prosperity ?” I lecture, this time barely able to contain my rage.

“My son,” the fool begs me “All your life I have read to you from the word. And all my life, I try to follow his example. Why have you turned to these vices ? Have I not done enough ?”

“Enough ? What is enough ?” I hear one of my followers sneer.

My father turns towards my followers and presumes he has power over them “What gospel has my son been preaching to you ?”

“The same one preached to me my whole life,” I answer him “Not by you, but the spirit of lonely places. The one whose land you built your foundation on and drain like a parasite. I’ve seen him my whole life, be it at the edge of the forests or the edge of my bed. It is by him I live today and it is him who taught me far more than you could hope too! One example is how even in death, the creation serves the creator.” I explain as we go deep enough into to cavern, where we built not only our butcher’s shop, but our gravesites.

All emotion and colour drained from my fathers face, as he sees we have adorned these caverns with our dead. Some from sickness and injury, or weakness and failure.

“As I said good Minister, we had to get the communion flesh and blood from somewhere. Some of it at least, the rest goes to our prisoners.” I point to a pit, but my father could not find the sense to move, so I had my men push him to the pits edge.

When he looked below, my father found his emotion, and voice “My son, what have you’ve been hunting ?”

“I’m sure you would call them demons, but they are part of creation, and thus have a place in in the new plan.” I look at the very creatures that fill my father with fear, but my people with faith and wonder.

“They are little ones! Children!” He says to me.

And so I answer “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”

The fool finds his voice yet again as he tries to teach me “Do you not see ? This, this is not of god, this not his will.” he gestures to the pit.

“Than it appears you have been listening to the wrong one.”

“Perhaps…and perhaps it is time for me to make a penance. When I found this land, I thought it was his will. I thought I would lead my people to true prosperity and make it the foundation that the new world is built upon. I believed that when you were born, you would serve as a true example of God’s will. I now see for the sake of redemption, it is my duty to lead them away from this land. I beg of you son, for your salvation, that you follow me. We are to leave this cursed place, and never return.” The fool begs.

I then knew, he couldn’t be helped. As he speaks, my followers laugh over him, and as he tries to walk, they block his path, leaving me and my father at the pits edge.

“You were correct. He does offer prosperity, he will spread his word and will onto the new world, and this colony is the foundation the kingdom will be built upon.” I take hold of his neck “And you are correct, in saying that I am a true example of his will for I am the way. I am the truth, and none shall live in this kingdom except through me. I will ascend above the tops of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High!” I reach into him, take his heart into my hand, and hold him over the edge “But you will fall to the realm of the dead, to the lowest depths of the Pit.”

And with that, still holding my fathers heart in my hand, I watch what’s left of life in his eyes drain as I release his body to the creatures below, they each take part in his flesh, but his heart I will save to communion. I believe his former followers will appreciate it, especially my mother.

I write this as a confession and a testament. It matters not to me that the colony will know the truth eventually, and then they will know, and they will all embrace the whole truth.