Chapter 36

After 3 Hours (2:30 PM)

Jungkook slowly fluttered his eyes open. As his vision adjusted, he saw Taehyung and Jimin sitting nearby, working on something while softly bickering. Their voices were low.

Jungkook just lay there, staring at them. Watching their bond, he was reminded of his own relationship with Eunwoo.

He remembered how they used to bicker over silly things-who got to drink the last milkshake, who would sleep next to their mom or noona, who got the last scoop of ice cream, and even who would spend more time with their hyung. Their arguments never lasted more than a few minutes before they patched things up.

But the last fight… it was different.

It wasn’t a silly argument. It was filled with misunderstandings, lies, painful truths, and words that hurt more than they should have.

And this time, they never patched up.

It had been two years.

The same friends who used to resolve their fights in minutes had now turned their minutes into years.

Jungkook’s eyes glistened with unshed tears.

“Hey, Kook, you’re awake,” Jimin said, snapping Jungkook out of his thoughts.

Jungkook quickly looked away and nodded, avoiding their gaze.

“Do you want anything, Kook?” Taehyung asked with concern.

Jungkook shook his head.

“Okay, wait, I’ll bring some food. You must be hungry,” Taehyung said, getting up.

“I-I’m not hungry,” Jungkook muttered.

“Just eat a little, hmm? You need to eat,” Jimin said, trying to make him understand.

Jungkook sighed before nodding reluctantly.

Taehyung smiled and left to get food.

Jimin sat beside Jungkook and placed a hand on his forehead. “Are you feeling better, Kook?” he asked gently.

Jungkook nodded, but Jimin could still feel the slight warmth of a lingering fever.

“Any uneasiness?” Jimin asked.

Jungkook shook his head. He finally looked up at Jimin and saw the pure concern, love, and care in his eyes-there was no fakeness, no pretense.

“Even he cares for me? But why?” Jungkook questioned himself, still struggling to believe the words Kim had told him about his brothers.

Soon, Taehyung returned with the food.

Jimin helped Jungkook sit up properly while Taehyung started feeding him with gentle care.

Jimin watched them with a fond smile. “You seem mature here, Tae.”

Taehyung smirked proudly. “See? I told you, didn’t I?” he said, puffing his chest slightly.

Jimin rolled his eyes. “Not now, you sulking bear.”

Taehyung glared at him. “Look who’s talking, you grumpy chick.”

Jungkook watched the two of them bicker like kindergarten kids. At one point, he couldn’t help but chuckle softly.

Jimin noticed it instantly. His heart swelled-he hadn’t seen that smile in years.

Taehyung also smiled.

Jungkook looked at them, confused.

“Laugh out loud, Kook,” Jimin said warmly. “We won’t judge you. We’ll listen to you.”

Jungkook stared at him, his heart pounding.

But then-

“You don’t even deserve to smile. I’m sure your smile is cursed. Every time you smile, something deadly happens. So stop fucking smiling.”

Kim’s cruel words echoed in his head.

His smile faded.

Jungkook took another bite from Taehyung’s hand, but he remained silent after that.

Taehyung and Jimin exchanged glances. Once Jungkook was done eating, they ate as well before giving him his medicines.

“Isn’t he afraid of it anymore?” Jimin whispered curiously.

Taehyung shook his head. “He’s so strong. He even removed the IV on his own,” he said, his voice laced with admiration.

Jimin’s eyes widened in shock. He turned to look at the nurse changing the IV and was even more stunned to see how calm Jungkook looked.

Jungkook noticed Jimin’s reaction and raised an eyebrow, silently asking what?

Jimin quickly shook his head. “Nothing,” he muttered.

“He isn’t the same, Taehyung-ah,” Jimin mumbled softly.

Taehyung nodded in agreement.

Once the nurse left, Taehyung walked up to Jungkook. “Take some rest, hmm?” he said gently, adjusting the blanket to make him comfortable.

Jungkook nodded and lay down.

“We’ll both be here. You can ask us for anything you need,” Taehyung reassured him.

Jungkook nodded again.

Taehyung smiled and returned to the couch, where he and Jimin resumed their work. But every now and then, they would glance at Jungkook, who was staring out the window, lost in thought.

After a while, Jungkook looked around as if searching for something. Jimin noticed.

“You need something?” he asked.

Jungkook nodded. “Phone?” he asked softly.

Taehyung stood up, grabbed Jungkook’s phone from the table, and handed it to him. “Don’t watch for too long, hmm?” he reminded.

Jungkook nodded and took the phone.

Taehyung and Jimin got back to work while Jungkook scrolled through his phone. His eyes landed on some messages from the mafia workers, and he sighed before continuing to scroll.

Then, his gaze froze on an article.

“Today is the biggest event. Bangtan is attending. Be ready. The secret is going to be revealed…”

Jungkook frowned. He looked up at Taehyung and Jimin before hesitantly asking, “Aren’t you guys going to the event?”

“We are,” Taehyung replied without looking up.

Jungkook nodded, hesitating for a moment before finally asking, “Umm… w-what secret is Kim going to reveal?” His voice was nervous.

Taehyung lifted his head, surprised. “Kim? You mean Appa?” he asked, emphasizing the word.

Jungkook nodded.

“We don’t know, Kook. I think it’s a surprise for us too,” Jimin said.

Jungkook nodded slowly.

“Why are you calling Appa by his name, Kook?” Taehyung asked, his voice calm but firm.

Jungkook swallowed hard. “I… I’m used to it,” he muttered. He didn’t know why but he felt scared a little.

Taehyung stared at him for a moment. “Appa didn’t tell you anything about this?”

Jungkook shook his head.

Taehyung sighed. “He really pampers you a lot…” he murmured.

And that was it.

Jungkook’s already broken heart shattered into even smaller pieces. His chest ached with silent screams and cries.

“He… He never pampered me. Never even spoke to me softly or properly,” Jungkook thought bitterly.

“Even if he pampers you this much, you should at least respect him. Calling him by his name isn’t the right way,” Taehyung said softly, trying to make him understand.

Jungkook clenched his jaw. “I’m used to it. I can’t change,” he snapped, going back to his phone.

Jimin exchanged a worried glance with Taehyung, who let out a soft sigh at Jungkook’s reaction.

Jimin patted Taehyung’s shoulder in comfort.

Taehyung nodded slightly, silently telling him he was fine.

Jungkook turned his back to them, his fingers mindlessly scrolling through his phone, but his mind was far from the screen. He wasn’t paying attention to anything in front of him-his thoughts consumed him entirely.

“Pamper me? He and softness? He never pampered me. Not even once. I have no memories of that. Why the fuck was I even born? Should I just… end this? Would that be better? I have no hope left. I’m so tired…”

His fingers stilled on the screen as his vision blurred with unshed tears.

“He asked me what I want, right? I want peace. I just want to sleep…sleep like there’s no tomorrow, with no pain, no nightmares, no pills forcing me to rest. I want these fucking scars to disappear. I want my Eomma. A-and… I just want a happy family.”

A single tear slipped down his cheek, tracing the invisible cracks in his heart.

“I don’t want these fucking headaches. I don’t want to fake my smiles anymore. I just want real happiness… real care. Is that too much to ask?”

A bitter chuckle escaped his lips.

“No. Why would a fucking killer like me need those things? I’m just a piece of unlucky shit. I wasn’t lucky enough to have a happy family. Maybe it’s true… maybe because of me, so many people died. Why am I still alive when they’re dead? Why did they save me? Why did they save this curse? Are they not disgusted by me?”

His grip on the phone tightened as more tears fell.

“And here, these two… calling themselves my brothers… showing me love and care. But I can’t trust them. I won’t trust them. Why should I? Even if they’re being genuine… I don’t fucking need them. They’re just like him. Just following him. Just pretending. I know it. If they ever find out what I really am… what I’ve done… they’ll throw me away. They’ll hate me, Just like before. They’ll say things like him. They’ll use me as a tool. A slave. A prey. A worker. A fucking experiment. That’s all I am, right?”

The more he thought, the deeper the knife twisted in his heart. It was like drowning, but no matter how much he wished to sink, the pain kept him afloat.

“It’s okay… I deserve this anyway.”

His trembling fingers hovered over his photo gallery, his breath hitching when his eyes landed on a picture-his mother.

His beautiful, kind, loving Eomma. The one person who would have held him, who would have kissed his scars, who would have told him he was enough.

“E-Eomma…” he mumbled brokenly, his voice so soft, so fragile, that no one heard.

His thumb traced over her image as sobs threatened to tear out of his chest.

“Why did you save me, Eomma? If you were here… if you were alive… would we have been happy? Would we have been a real family? Why did you save me that day? I am dying in guilt. I failed as a son, Eomma. I-“

“I killed Hyungie. I killed him with my own hands. Why? Why did I do that? If you were alive… and you saw what I did… you would be disgusted by me. You would have kicked me out. I know it. I know it. And you’d be right to do it.”

His silent cries turned into desperate, shuddering gasps. His nails dug into his palms, his vision swimming in an ocean of pain.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Not a single day has passed without guilt crushing me. If I hadn’t said those words that day, would Hyungie still be alive? Would we still be together?”

He let out a silent sob.

“Noona and Eunnie are angry at me too. And they should be. They have every right to hate me.”

His chest ached. It ached so much that he wished it would stop beating.

“I-I’m sorry…”

But no one heard him. No one ever heard him.

His pain was a scream locked inside a prison of silence. His wishes were so simple, yet they felt impossible-like stars he could never reach.

He was drowning in his own thoughts, a never-ending loop of self-hatred and hopelessness. He wished for death. He wished for an end.

He was already at the last stage of his suffering.

And no one-not a single soul-could hear him breaking.

Tae and Jimin were focusing on their project, but their attention kept drifting toward Jungkook. Every few minutes, their eyes flickered to him, silently observing.

“Tae, don’t you feel like something’s… off?” Jimin whispered, concern laced in his tone.

Tae exhaled deeply, nodding. “He’s so… different.”

Jimin sighed, his fingers hesitating over the keyboard. “Don’t worry, Tae… But was it really just a nightmare?” he asked, his worry growing with each passing second.

Tae stared at him, his jaw tightening. Jimin quickly typed into the search bar about nightmares, and as soon as the results appeared, their eyes widened.

“Nightmares are usually caused by past trauma.”

Both of them gasped softly.

“Is this real? Or are we just overthinking?” Tae muttered, shifting uncomfortably.

“Who knows… Let’s ask Hobi-hyung later,” Jimin suggested, his voice barely above a whisper.

Tae nodded absentmindedly, his gaze drifting back to Jungkook. He was completely lost in his thoughts, his face unreadable. Just then, Tae’s phone rang. He glanced down and saw the caller ID—Hyunwoo.

“Who is that?” Jimin asked.

“Your appa,” Tae replied.

Jimin hummed in acknowledgment while Tae answered the call.

“Nae, samchoon,” Tae spoke respectfully.

“What are you guys doing, Tae?” Hyunwoo’s voice came through, calm and gentle.

“Me and Jimin are working on a project, and Jungkook is resting.”

“Hmm… How is he?” Hyunwoo asked hesitantly.

Tae glanced at Jungkook, noticing how still he was. “He looks fine, but his fever hasn’t gone down much.”

A silence stretched between them before Hyunwoo finally spoke. “Hmm… Um… C-can you give him the phone?” His voice held a hint of nervousness.

Tae hesitated for a second before saying. “Sure, samchoon.”

He turned to Jungkook, calling him softly, “Kook.”

Jungkook blinked out of his daze, looking at Tae with those sad, lifeless eyes that made Tae’s chest tighten.

“Huh?” Jungkook asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Tae held out the phone. “Samchoon wants to talk to you.”

Jungkook sighed heavily but took the phone without protest. He pressed it against his ear.

“Kook?” Hyunwoo’s voice came through gently.

“Mm,” Jungkook hummed, his tone as cold as ice.

“How are you feeling?” Hyunwoo asked carefully.

“Fine.”

A tense silence settled between them.

“Did you eat and take your medicines?” Hyunwoo asked.

Jungkook gave a nonchalant hum in response.

Hyunwoo sighed on the other end. “Kookie… I-I’m sorry for yesterday.”

Jungkook said nothing.

“I lost my temper when you asked about killing yourself. But that’s not the solution, Kook. You have to know that.” Hyunwoo tried.

Jungkook’s grip on the phone tightened, his nails digging into his palm. His voice came out sharp, distant, emotionless—in Italian.

“Then what is the solution?”

Hyunwoo’s breath hitched. “Kook—”

But Jungkook didn’t let him finish. “Tae-ssi, take this.” His voice was flat, empty.

He held out the phone for Tae, refusing to say another word.

Tae sighed, taking it. “Samchoon?”

There was a pause before Hyunwoo spoke again. “Alright, Tae. Take care. Jin will be there in half an hour.”

Before Tae could respond, Jimin suddenly snatched the phone from his hands.

“Appaaaa!” Jimin whined like a child.

Jungkook’s head snapped up at the soft, affectionate tone.

“Nae, Chim?” Hyunwoo responded, his voice filled with warmth.

Jimin pouted, playing with the hem of his shirt. “Where are you? When will you come?”

Hyunwoo chuckled softly. “I’ll be home in an hour with your hyungie, Chim.”

Jimin huffed. “Tell that grumpy grandpa to stay there itself. Hmph. Anyway, bye.”

Before Hyunwoo could reply, Jimin hung up.

Jungkook was staring at him. But unlike before, his gaze wasn’t empty—it was filled with something else.

Jealousy.

A raw, aching kind of jealousy that twisted his insides.

He watched Jimin laugh so freely with their father. He watched the easy, warm exchange between them. He watched the love in Hyunwoo’s voice, in Jimin’s whiny complaints, in their familiarity.

And he wondered—why had he never been on the receiving end of that?

He turned away before they could notice the way his hands trembled.

He had hoped, once upon a time, for that kind of bond with his own father. He had dreamed about it as a child. He had wished for it every day.

But wishes were just that—wishes.

They never came true.

His heart ached in places he thought had gone numb long ago.

“Kook?” Tae’s soft voice pulled him from his thoughts. “You want something?”

The gentleness in his voice was almost unbearable.

Jungkook shook his head without turning around. “No.”

He heard Tae sigh. Jimin too. But he didn’t care.

His heart had already closed itself off again.

Hey guys how was the chapter? Do you like it??

Tell me your thoughts about the story.

Btw sorry for this late update. I had a fever that’s why… I am fine today so I updated.

Anyway pls do a lot of comments.

Tell your thoughts about the characters too.

So I will ask a question let’s see how many answers. If you’ve noticed. Jin calls Kim as dad. Tae calls Kim as appa and Jungkook calls Kim as Kim. Why?

Any guesses??

20+ comments for next chapter ..